Are We There Yet?
by borndancer
Summary: We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.
1. Alice's Big Ideas

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**Authors note:** Eeeeek First Twilight Fic :3 I shall love twilight forever and ever and ever :

Please Review it encourages me to write more

The car journey lasts about 4 hours which is correct as I worked out on goggle maps how long it takes to get from Forks to Seattle.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it, I would be rolling in it and talking to Edward right now

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

**BPOV**

"Look Alice, you _really _don't have to take me shopping, and in Seattle, maybe its not such a good idea."

It was that time of the year again for Alice's Annual shopping trip to Seattle. Why she couldn't just shop in Forks or even Port Angeles is still a mystery to me. A shops a shop right?

" Bella face it, your coming shopping with me like it or not, remember you don't have a choice."

Her petite face lit up at the excitement of shopping for hours, not just for herself but me as well. As she knows from previous experiences that I won't do it well on my own.

I sighed facing the facts that I was not getting out of this. And no one was going to save me from the big, scary, shopaholic maniac. A.k.a Alice Cullen.

" Alice, who else is coming with us?" Please god let someone else be sharing my torture, I don't think I can stand talking about the pro's and con's of false eyelashes on my own all day.

She seemed happy that I was actually talking to her about our _trip_. It soon changed into a concentrated expression. Taking her fingers out of her pockets and counting each one, as if working out a complicated maths sum.

"Well Jazzie's coming" I noticed her smile inwardly to herself. "Oh yeah Eddie and Emmett are also coming, they haven't had some Alice Time in so long. I think they need it."

At least I wasn't the only one being forced to shopping. It would be pretty hilarious seeing Emmett trawling around the shops with Alice's bags in tow.

As if on cue Edward and Emmett bounded into the room looking pleased with themselves. Alice mustn't have told them where she was taking us. This was going to be more fun than I expected.

I walked over to Edward trying to contain my laughter. He still seemed unaware of the day ahead so Alice must have been Translating Agadoo into Korean or something similar. What goes on in her brain is a mysterious to all of us.

Edward pulled me to his side wrapping his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I snuggled into his chest, inhaling his intoxicating smell. I looked up and him and he smiled his perfect crooked smile at me.

Why must you always dazzle me Edward? I thought to myself

"Looking forward to today love?"

Yep he definitely did not have a clue. At least I could feel better about myself in a way . I was told 2 days ago so I had some time to prepare my self. I did feel a bit sorry for him and Emmett, completely clueless of today's events.

"Yeah,I guess"

I smiled back nervously. Not being able to match the perfectness of my lovers smile.

I looked over to Emmett to see what he was doing. What was he doing? He was doing some sort of stretching, if you could call it that, in the corner of the room. Ahh Alice told them we were playing baseball and I was watching. Perfect.

Before I could even ask when we were going, _something_ barged in through the door.

'Oh no, please don't be who I think it is'

**EPOV**

What is with everyone today. Bella is well, she looks nervous for some reason. Alice can't have upset her yet could she? It is Alice who were talking about, so that's possible. And Alice. Why on earth is she rapping the theme of 'fresh prince of belair' in Polish?

_. . . .Rozpoczynany wyrabiający (stworzenie) martwić (zmartwienie) w moim wchodzę (zebrał) jed mały (niewielka ilość; trochę) walka (walczyć) i mój . . . .._

_'Oh no, please don't be who I think it is' Emmett thought_

Who's what? Have I missed something? I turned my attention to the door.

Oh my lord

Jasper suddenly bounced through the door in what seemed to be white trainers, black cropped sports trousers, a blue polo shirt. Since when did Jasper dress up for baseball?

"Jasper,man, what the hell happened to you? Emmett called out, trying to sound concerned but failing.

" I know what she's like when she gets started, once she's off there's no stopping her." He turned to smile sweetly at his wife. " I thought nearer the end of the day, i'll be glad of wearing this."

He seemed pretty proud of himself. But baseball and Alice, she isn't that fast and good is she?

Wait a second . . . . .

"Nooooooooooo, Alice, Please, I beg of you please, please, please, please don't make me go please" Shopping, I mean shopping come one. I looked up at her face, she was obviously having fun with this. There was no other option I'd have to beg.

I got down onto both knees and did my best puppy dog eyes for my stupid sister.

"Please Alice, Please , please, please i'll do anything"

"Nope your coming, everyone in here is"

Damn how much I wish I could knock that stupid grin of her face.

Emmett was still clueless in the corner of the room, as usual.

**Alice POV**

'God its fun making everyone's life a living hell.'

I looked over to Emmett in the corner, was he really this dumb? I did feel sorry for him sometimes with me,Jazzie's and Eddie having powers and him not. He always seems left out. This was the brilliant time to make him feel left out more.

_Edward don't tell Emmett were going shopping, I'll make him carry all the bags if you do_

Edward nodding and grinned at me. I guess he did read my thoughts then.

"Come on Emmett time to go Baseball"


	2. Plan of Escape

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**Authors note:** Thank you for all the reviews and faves and alerts. They worked and made stop dancing and write instead.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it, I would be writing midnight sun at this moment in time and killing Bella off and replacing her with someone called Borndancer. :

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

**EMPOV**

God why is everyone looking at me like I am stupid. If anyone is stupid in this room its definitely not me. Well I am the youngest out of my family **but** I'm still older than little Bella. Maybe I'm getting paranoid. Can vampires get Paranoid?

"Come on Emmett,lets go Baseball" Came Alice's little soprano voice down my ears. The laughing from Jasper and Edward also came. Is there something someone isn't telling me. I wouldn't put it past the pixie. Before I could even protest I was dragged out of the house onto the front garden.

This is going to be a **long** day.

**BPOV**

Come on Bella there's got to be a way out of this, all I need is a little diversion and I'll be gone. Edward looked down at me smiling, presumably reading Emmett's thoughts.

"Come on love, lets get this over and done with"

Bingo

Edward will forgive me later for using him as the decoy duck.

"Yeah sooner the better, can I just have a human minute first?"

Please don't see through my lies, please. If there is a god, please be kind.

"Sure love, want me to wait or what?"

"Urm. . . you can wait down there if you like? I won't be long"

"Ok love"

He bent down and give me a quick kiss on my forehead sniffing me as he did. Legs please don't fail me now.

I ran as quickly as I could without giving myself a concussion or worst towards the bathroom. Now I was stuck. How would I escape without A. Anyone seeing me. B. Alice seeing me escaping. Or C. Killing myself in the process. Knowing my luck it would be all 3. Unless I stay up here until Edward thinks I've gone down then they'll leave without me. I'm betting it'll be better than trying to climb down the side of the house. And much more safer for me. and the house.

**JPOV**

How long does it take to choose a car to take to Seattle. For me or any normal person it takes, what 20 seconds. But no not Alice. Although Alice can be questioned as a normal person. Well Vampire.

"Alice,Love, Are you nearly done?

I heard a muffled sort of scream and a clang of something metal hitting the floor of the garage. Maybe that's a signal for me to go and look. I walked into the garage and saw Emmett pinned up against the wall by Alice. Now that's a moment that I'll never let him forget.

Alice was angry with Emmett. I think I will leave her to be angry it'll be much more fun to watch.

As soon as Alice saw me, she let Emmett off the wall and turned to me as if nothing was the matter.

"Oh, sorry Jazzie, me and Emmett had a little _Situation."_

She turned and glared daggers at Emmett.

"Were taking Rose's BMW by the way, I'm sure she won't mind. She's out with Carlisle and Esme for the weekend anyway she'll never know.

"What about the Keys Alice?"

"Oh I sorted that out too, _Emmett _gladly got them me, didn't you Emmett?

Emmett was now situated on the floor and just nodded. No one wants to face the wrath of Alice, believe me I know.

"Are we ready to go then? More time in Seattle I guess _for baseball"_ I whispered the last part, loud enough that Emmett could hear though. When he heard this he picked himself of the floor and dusted himself off.

"What are we waiting for then, lets go"

His booming voice overpowered everyone's in the garage.

"Come on then let's go"

She turned happy again bounding into the red convertible.

"**Edward come on were going**" I shouted, I couldn't let him miss out on the torture of today.

**EPOV**

Bella's human moment was taking longer than I expected. Long was an understatement. Perhaps she had already got in the car. Well dragged by Alice most likely. That was my theory anyway.

I ran over to the car after hearing Jasper shout and got myself in Rose's BMW. Were we allowed to use her car? Emmett was unusually quiet in the back with myself and Jasper.

"Emmett, are you okay?, your lets just say quiet for once"

_Do you really want to know_

Ah he doesn't want anyone else to know so he's thinking it for me. Nice.

_Alice, she forced me to tell her where the keys were to rose's car. She said if I didn't she'd make us go shopping instead of baseball. I refused. So she said if I didn't get them for her she would tell rose I was flirting with girls in Seattle. I'm doomed man. Dead._

Ooh Emmett has got it bad.

We were speeding along the roads out of Forks when suddenly the car stopped. What's Alice forgotten now?

"Urm Guy's I think we have forgotten something"

Oh no

Everyone in the car turned to look at each other

"Bella"

* * *

**A/n: **Muahaha :D . . . . Bella is going to be deader than dead I think. As she said in her own words to Edward one time. 'Grizzly s are tame compared to what's waiting for you at home'

:

Review please it makes me happy

I'll give you cupcakes


	3. Car Captive

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**Authors note:** Thank you again for reviews. H mph not much more to say really. Enjoy? Oh yeah I'll add a recap section from now on.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it, I would be sitting in my happy corner and writing more love scenes with Bella and Edward.

_**Recap:**_

_Alice is taking the boys and Bella shopping in Seattle_

_Everyone knows about it but Emmett, he thinks there going to play baseball_

_Alice and co have just realised that they have left Bella at home_

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_Urm Guy's I think we have forgotten something"_

"_Bella"_

**BPOV**

I crawled slowly out of the wardrobe I was hiding in after hearing the sound of a car pulling out of the driveway below me. Did they really go without me? Thank God if they have. I peered cautiously over the edge of the windowsill to see if they really had gone. No one was talking so they must have gone. Home now. I smiled to myself

I skipped down the stairs towards the front door of the Cullens house.

Alice is going to kill me when she gets back. Suppose its better than getting tortured shopping all day

**APOV**

Bella is so dead when I get my hands on her. Deader than Dead. Extinct. I was so busy terrorising Emmett I didn't concentrate my visions towards Bella. She obviously must have stayed upstairs when everyone else jumped in the car.

I made a quick U turn on the small country road leading out of Forks and headed towards our house. _Again._

"Alice,love calm down. It's onl-

"Jasper, I am not angry"

Why does everyone take me for being angry when I'm annoyed. Soon however I felt relaxed and not annoyed at all.

Thanks a lot Jasper

As we neared the house again, I was going to make sure that this time _no-one_ escaped from my little shopping trip.

"Emmett,Edward don't even try anything while I'm gone, unless you want to play Barbie when we get back home"

Emmett and Edward turned to look at each other horrified.

At least they weren't going anywhere.

I stepped gracefully out of the car and ran towards the front of the house, seeing a very surprised and startled Bella stopped dead in her tracks.

**BPOV**

Shit

Out of no-where a shiny red convertible with a bouncing black haired pixie girl jumping out of it turned up on the driveway of the house

Mrs Pixie doesn't look very pleased to see me.

Double Shit

Quick Bella, think of a lie... Oh who am I kidding I can't lie to save my life.

"Well hello _Bella,_ what are you doing here?"

Maybe if I commit suicide now, Alice will forget about the shopping trip?

"Urghh hi Alice"

I waved sheepishly to Alice, trying to look as natural as I could be. As well as being a bad liar I was a bad actor. The odds didn't seem to be in my favour today. I looked over to the red car and saw the occupants waiting for Alice to say something. Great spectators of my death, lovely.

"Bella, please tell me why you thought you could get out of going shopping with me?"

"Well . . I . . . urgh . . . . I didn't really"

"Want to get in the car yourself or do I need to drag you?"

"I'll be fine Alice"

Her annoyed face suddenly changed to her usual happy and perky one. As if someone had just flicked a switch. She grabbed my hand and pulled me to the car and pushed me in. When I could think again we were on the road out of Forks.

"So first were going to visit Chanel and Gucci for clothes, then were going to go to a one to one appointment wit- . . . . ."

This is going to be a long day

**EPOV**

Poor Bella, how did I not realise Bella would try to pull something off like this. Why didn't I think of it?

"Tried to give Alice the slip, hey Bella" Asked Emmett. If only he knew where we were going. He would have tried to do something similar hours ago.

"Sorry, Emmett, guess I don't really like baseball too much"

Bella lieing? Now that's a first, and Emmett actually believed it. But then again, if your Emmett you'd believe anything.

_How can you __**not **__like baseball_

Gullible Emmett

"Bella, love, are you okay, you look a little ill"

Playing sick, is this really my Bella?

"I..I'm fine Edward, I just feel really sick"

I reached forward and grabbed her hand softly, intertwining our fingers and slowly rubbed her hand for comfort.

"Alice, _please_ slow down, your going too fast"

"_**Urghhhhhh**__"_

**There we go :**

**Sorry the Chapters a tad short, well for my liking. I might be able to get a new chapter out before the end of tonight anyway.**

**Reviews please, as always or message me with ideas or shiz :3 I like PM's **


	4. Ispy

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it Edward would be saying this disclaimer right now

**Edward: But I am saying it**

Borndancer: O.o

_**Recap:**_

_Alice is taking the boys and Bella shopping in Seattle_

_Everyone knows about it but Emmett, he thinks there going to play baseball_

_Alice and co have just realised that they have left Bella at home_

_Alice gets Bella back, but Bella becomes ill because of Alice's fast driving. _

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_Alice, please slow down, your going too fast"_

"_Urghhhhhh"_

**Time: 10:32:27**

**Current Speed: 180 Mph**

**Miles Driven: 50450**

**JPOV**

"Come on love, slow down a little bit."

"Jasper, If I slow down any more we will not make it to Seattle till 3:00"

"Alice, don't you think your slightly exaggerating?"

No answer came from Alice. I looked over to Bella and she didn't look good.

"Alice look at Bella, do you really want her to throw up in Rose's car?"

Alice groaned again.

"Fine, I'm only doing this for the sake of Rose and her car you know"

Alice is angry now. I've not seen her like this for years, decades even. I'm sure she'll perk up when she gets shopping.

I looked over to the dashboard and noticed the speed decrease to just pushing 100 Mph.

APOV

I hate driving slow _so _much. What's the point in choosing a fast car to go to Seattle in to drive slow in. I suppose it's better than cleaning sick out of it though.

I looked over to Bella. How could I be so horrible to her. I'm acting like Rosalie here. No wonder Emmett has a grin on his face.

"Urghh Bella are you feeling any better?"

Apologising sucks. Especially if you know your in the wrong.

"I'm feeling better"

"Look Bella, I'm sorry for being angry and taking it out on you, I just got kind of annoyed"

"It's fine Alice honestly"

"Accept my apology then?"

"I accept it"

I grinned madly, I was feeling better already and we hadn't even got to the shops yet.

A long drive and 1 hour later

"Alice are we there yet?"

"Emmett if you know what's best for you, you will shut up now"

"Yeah but, are we there yet?"

Out of the mirror I could see everyone turn to look at Emmett, including Bella. Who was feeling better from her little sick scenario.

"**Emmett" **Everyone in the car said in unison.

He groaned and sunk back into his seat leaning his head on his hands. Why must my brother be so childish.

A long drive and another hour later

**Time: 12:52:19**

**Current Speed: 102 Mph**

**Miles Driven: 50678**

"Alice"

"Yes Emmett"

"Are we there yet"

Oh good lord.

"No Emmett we are not there, _so quit asking"_

"Yeah but Al-.."

"Emmett _**shut up" **_Edward joined in the shutting up of Emmett campaign this time. "Emmett if you are really so bored, go play one of them silly human games they play on car journeys"

I always knew Edward was clever. He's definitely excelled himself this time.

"Good thinking Eddy"

Edward sighed in boredom. I think you would if you were sitting next to Emmett. Jasper was happily entertaining himself playing I-Spy with Bella.

**EMPOV**

"_Edward_ I don't know what human game to play"

Car journeys are so boring when driven slow. And when not driving. Maybe if I keep asking we'll get there quicker.

"And what would I know about human car journey games Emmett?"

"Well your the one that suggested it"

He threw his arms up in the air and sighed. "Urghh ask Bella _pleas_e"

I guess he doesn't know then.

"Belly-Welly give me a human car game to play, please_"_

"You can play I-Spy with me and Jaz if you want?"

Yes,Yes, and thrice yes. Finally someone listens to me.

"Thank you,thank you,thank you, Urghh how do you play?"

"Easy Emmett if your on you pick something you can see and say 'I spy with my little eye something beginning with' and say the letter of the thing you are thinking of. Okay. If your not on you have to guess what the other person can see. Easy right Emmett."

Oh that is so easy, these humans have so simple minds, honestly.

"Easy as playing baseball"

"Urghh right Emmett"

"You sure Emmett can cope with this Bella? I don't think he understands"

Damn you stupid smartie pants Jasper. You will pay. And I shall own you at this game.

5 minutes after

This game is going to be so much fun. I love winning.

"Emmett it's your go"

"Go to sleep Bella,I'll let you know when Emmett picks something"

Ha ha, very funny Jasper. _Not_

"Okay I have one, I spy with my little Eye, something beginning with Fen-...

"Is it fence by any chance Emmett?" Jasper had his eyes closed while saying this, could vampires sleep?

"Your good at this Jasper"

_Shit_, I knew I should have chosen a harder word

"Come on Jazzie your turn, because Bella's asleep"

"Fine" he sighed. Was I boring him. No surely not. " I spy with my little eye something beginning with 'S'"

"Sheep?"

"Nope"

"Sky?"

"Nope"

"Sun?"

"Sea?"

"Emmett where's the sea?"

"Oh yeah, Sheep?"

"**No** Emmett"

"Oooooh I know what it is"

"What?"

"Sunflower"

"Lord help me"

"Is it not that?

"No Emmett"

"Have I said Sheep?"

"Yes Emmett 3 times"

His voice had no expression, maybe he is bored of I-spy

"I give up darn it, tell me"

"It was scaffolding Emmett"

Wait a second what's scaffolding

"Guys I have a vision of you arguing but before you do save it for when were out of the car, were here"

_**Baseball Yay**_

**Sorry but this chapter was too fun to write. Who would have thought it hey Emmett playing I-spy. Bless him.**

**Thank you for reviews and faves et c again. **

**If you have ideas for what you want to happen in Seattle PM me :**


	5. Offical Bag Carrier

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it Jacob would be a house dog that likes to eat. A lot. :)

_**Recap:**_

_Alice is taking the boys and Bella shopping in Seattle_

_Everyone knows about it but Emmett, he thinks there going to play baseball_

_Alice and co have just realised that they have left Bella at home_

_Alice gets Bella back, but Bella becomes ill because of Alice's fast driving_

_Alice drives slower, to pass time Emmett plays I-Spy with Jasper and Bella. _

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_It was scaffolding Emmett"_

_Wait a second what's scaffolding_

"_Guys I have a vision of you arguing but before you do save it for when were out of the car, were here"_

"_**Baseball Yay"**_

EPOV

Finally were here, if that's a good thing or bad I don't know. On the plus side I don't have to listen to Emmett try to play I-spy any more. Then again, now I have to suffer hours and hours of shopping with Alice. Maybe I can convince her to let me and Bella go off on our own somewhere. I doubt it.

"Come on everyone shopping time"

Alice was grinning like a maniac. She seemed to be enjoying the thought of making all of us go shopping with her. More bag carriers for her.

_What does she mean shopping, were going to play baseball. Aren't we?_

I totally forgot about Emmett not knowing we were going shopping. His face is going to be priceless when he finds out. Who's going to tell him?

I ran over to Alice and whispered into her ear so that Emmett wouldn't hear.

"Alice when are we telling Emmett"

"Tell him now" she was giggling as she said it. "You can tell him though, it will be more funny"

"Thanks Alice"

How to tell Emmett. Hmm mm

"Emmett, I think there's something me,Alice,Jasper and Bella needs to tell you"

"That were not really in Seattle but in San Francisco instead?"

Bella looks confused. Please don't ruin my fun love. I know, I'll mime shopping to her.

I walked over to Bella and wrapped my arms around her waist and mimed Alice shopping and pointed subtly to Emmett. She nodded.

"No Emmett, Alice is taking us all-.."

"**Taking us where Edward, **_**Baseball**_**?**

Aww Emmy's worried now.

"We.Are.Going.Shopping.All.Day"

I waited for him to say something but nothing came. I turned to face him but he wasn't there. Strange. I looked down and there he was on his knees begging to Alice.

"**Nooooo, Alice, Please, Nooo, _anything _but shopping, _PLEASE_"**

"Na ah, me and Eddy had a little bet. If he didn't tell you we were going shopping I'd made you carry everyone's bags all day."

Maybe I should apologise

"Sorry Emmett"

"Aww Come on Emmy,you know its for the best"

"I hate you two" Emmett said while glaring at us both.

Why does Jasper and Bella never get the blame

"Emmett its not just me and Alice you know, Jasper and Bella were in on it too"

"Urghhh does the whole world hate me, and Bella" Emmett turned to face Bella and grabbed both of her hands. "I thought you loved me?"

"Sorry Emmett,"

"You know you did deserve it after putting me through a game of I-spy with you"

Good one Jasper, if Emmett plays that stupid game on the way back, I may have to kill myself.

"Right shall we go then, I've booked a nail appointment for me and Bella in 10 minutes"

Awww poor Bella, she's got it bad being the only girl besides Alice.

**BPOV**

Are you joking me, a nail appointment. When I said to Alice I'd come shopping, I thought that I'd just be looking round shops all day. Now that I had a choice in going or not. But nails, this is beyond a joke.

"Come on love, better not be late, can't miss your manicure now can we?"

Urghhh I hate you Alice, Edwards going to annoy me about everything like this all day isn't she? She shall not break me and Edward up I repeat not break me an Edwards relationship.

I slapped him playfully and looked up to him. He put on a face as if I'd hurt him. So I went closer to him and lay my head on his chest. He smiled at me crookedly and began walking us behind Alice.

**At the nail place**

"Urm Alice, don't you think Luxury Nails sound a bit, well posh"

Alice has successfully dragged me and her to the nail salon in less than 5 minutes. She left the boys in some fancy restaurant, telling them not to try anything clever. No doubt they wouldn't with Alices knack of seeing things before they happen.

"Nonsense Bella, you'll fit in fine, trust me"

Trust isn't a word I've frequently used with Alice in the past. No choice or Alice's Decision, would be better words.

She dragged me into the nail salon. In the reception were big fancy looking arm chairs with a coffee table and a coffee maker. Through the reception were big fancy tables and more arm chairs with lots of snobby looking old women sitting having there nails done. _Oh crap_

"Urm Alice, I'll just sit here while you have yours done, okay"

All the women were wearing top designer clothes and high heel shoes or big funny fluffy hats. Here I was wearing a plain white t shirt, black jeans and my favourite pair of trainers. I'm doomed

"Bella, you are having your nails done like it or not, follow me"

"But Ali-.."

"_**Come on Bella,**_ it'll be a blast, honestly."

Why did I just not kill myself when Alice found me at home.

Alice grinned as she pulled us both into chairs side by side of each other and told the nail technicians what we wanted. Guess what Alice picked mine. Obviously she knew I would pick plain and simple ones.

**Outside of Luxury Nails**

"Alice.I.Hate.You"

"I know, you'll thank me later"

"Alice please, I can't even pick things up any more"

"Oh shut up whining Bella, you'll get used to it, anyway were going somewhere else now"

"Are we going to meet up with the boys?"

"Nope, Were going to get our hair done at the Mode Salon"

"_**Sorry**____**What"**_

**I'm actually enjoying writing this part of the story more, its going to be so much fun.**

**-Cue evil laugh-**

**Thank you for suggestions of what else to happen in Seattle. Keep them coming if you want. **

**Had to make Alice give Bella a Makeover xD**

**Now what if Alice gives Emmett a makeover :**


	6. Whats Foundation?

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I would be having frequent shopping trips with Alice

_**Recap:**_

_Alice is taking the boys and Bella shopping in Seattle_

_Everyone knows about it but Emmett, he thinks there going to play baseball_

_Alice and co have just realised that they have left Bella at home_

_Alice gets Bella back, but Bella becomes ill because of Alice's fast driving_

_Alice drives slower, to pass time Emmett plays I-Spy with Jasper and Bella._

_Alice makes Bella get nails done and wants her to have makeover _

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_Are we going to meet up with the boys?"_

"_Nope, Were going to get our hair done at the Mode Salon"_

"_**Sorry****What"**_

_**APOV**_

"Come on Bella, makeover time"

I grabbed her by the hand and started to pull her into the hair salon. Being careful not to split my new nails.

"Wait, Alice, Wait"

What now

"Look Bella, you've known me for a long time now, I'm not one to reason with what I've decided."

"But.But.But I have a really fun idea to do still involving makeovers"

"Shoot"

"What if we gave one of the boys a makeover, but a girly one"

Oh my god Bella, I never knew you thought like that. You learning well my dear. I grinned at the possibilities forming in my head. Taking Bella on this trip wasn't going as bad as it thought it would be.

"But who to makeover"

We both turned to look at each other.

"_Emmett_"

** A short walk and 5 minutes later **

"Everyone were back" I shouted loudly into the busy restaurant the boys were sitting in. Maybe we should take Jazzie and Eddie with us so they can laugh at Emmett. Yes. That could work well. Emmett ran behind Emmett trying to hide himself.

"Emmett I've changed my mind a little"

"I don't have to go shopping?"

"Sort-of"

"It was Bella's idea actually so you can thank her later"

I looked over to Edward and he was grinning madly trying to stifle a laugh. He must have read my mind to what we were going to do to Emmett. The fun starts here.

"Emmett you have a choice you can A. go shopping as was planned or B. go to a mysterious place but no shopping."

"B,B,B,B,B,B,B,B,B,"

Me and Edward looked at each other and grabbed Emmett.

"Bella,love go get something as a blindfold"

Good thinking Eddie

"urghh ok, what shall I get?"

"Ooh use my scarf"

I knew my scarf would come in use sometime. Bella grabbed the scarf off of my neck and handed it to Edward. Edward slung the scarf around Emmett's head and tied it quickly around his head.

"Hey who turned off the lights?"

"_**EMMETT"**_

"Now Emmett, take mine and Bella hand and we will lead you to the secret place"

Just then Jasper walked in to us. Where he has been I do not know, but I haven't got time to find out at the moment.

"Alice? Bella? Edward?_**Emmett? **_What.The.Hell?

"Edward fill him in"

Jazzie you really do pick the worst times.

** A longer walk with Emmett and 15 minutes later **

**BPOV**

Jasper and Edward now had Emmett and me and Alice were rushing ahead trying to plan things for our little 'makeover'

"Alice how the hell are we going to be able to book the salon for us to make him over in such little time"

"Bella, stop worrying, when you have my charm, any things possible" **A/n Wow that line looks cheesier than it sounded in my head**

Alice dragged me inside of the Mode Salon _again. _I just stood by the door while she chatted up the conveniently male receptionist.

"Hi welcome to Mode Salon, how may I help you"

Urghh why do they always sound so fake

"Yes you can help me, I'd like to hire the salon and all your equipment for a couple of hours"

"Well... I don't think that's possible Madam."

She leaned closer to the man and took his shirt into her hand and pulled him close so she could whisper in his ear.

"I'm sure we can come to some sort of arrangement"

"Urghh, well yes, that's fine madam, we'll be in the staff room just knock when you've finished.

That was the last I saw of him and his hairdressers before they dissapeared into the staff room.

"Alice, that was. _Brilliant_"

She just grinned at me.

"Emmett, come in now"

Edward and Jasper brought a very confused Emmett and sat him in one of the chairs facing the mirrors.

Alice walked over to him and quickly whipped the blindfold off.

"Welcome to Mode Salon Emmy, were going to make you into a princess"

His eyes went wide like saucers.

"Emmett you did have a choice" I said giggling. "It was either this or shopping"

He relaxed back in his chair, he knew he wasn't getting out of this, so he may as well just cope with it.

5minutes and 1 check-list later

_Emmett Makeover Check-list_

_Foundation -jaz_

_Blusher-Ja2_

_False eyelashes-A3_

_Eye-liner-Bel_

_Eye-shadow - Ed_

_Glitter-JBE3_

_Lipstick - Be2_

_Lip gloss_

_Bronzer - Ed2_

_Blusher_

_Nail varnish - Ali_

_Hair - Al2_

Alice just showed all of us a list, it had a list of things we were going to do to Emmett.

"Now everyone, I'm going to assign you all to a different thing to do to Emmett."

Oh this is going to be fun. Edward was standing next to me holding my hand, swinging It up and down. I think he was excited about making Emmett into a girl.

"Now were going to do it in stages so I'll tell everyone there first task first okay"

"Why do you get to take charge"

"I get to take charge because Jasper I am a girl and know lots about makeover"

"Oh"

"Now Jazzie you will do foundation, Eddie you do eye shadow, I'll do nail varnish and Bella you can do eye liner. Now any questions"

"What's foundation look like?"

"_Jasper_"

**JPOV**

Poor poor Emmett, by the time Alice and us have finished he'll have wished he would have picked shopping for weeks.

Alice handed me a pot of foundation and a sponge. Now to figure out how to put foundation. I turned it over, above the sponge. Nope that doesn't work. I looked at it confused, thinking of how it works.

"Jasper you dip the sponge in and rub it in his face"

"Oh"

I knew that obviously.

I started spreading the brown stuff over Emmett's face, this looked like torture for him. While this was going on Alice was painting his nails bright pink, Bella was lining his eyes with a pencil of some sort and Edward was painting his eyes with weird powder stuff.

After The Makeover

**APOV**

"Emmy look in the mirror"

"No"

"Awww come on"

"No, I refuse to look in the mirror"

"What would you say if I said the word Shopping"

"I suppose a quick peek wouldn't hurt me... _**ALICE I'M GOING TO KILL YOU**_"

"Come on Emmett you look so... masculine"

"Yeah as manly as a ballerina"

"_**SHUT IT EDWARD**_"

**What does Emmett look like and what is Alice,Bella and the guys going to do with him. Find out soon in net chapter :**

**What do you want to happen next? All ideas welcome. By the way ideas that have already been suggested and not used as of yet. Does not mean I will not use, just need to find a suitable place. :**

**IMPORTANT:**

**Okay maybe not quite as important as the CAPS LOCKS but I'm not going to be able to update again till Late Monday. I'm in a stupid small caravan for 3 whole days. **_I will gladly update if I haven't either Died of boredom, Lack of Laptop, dancing and / Word processing stuff. Or Squished to death by the lack of space in caravan or squished by too many people being in it. Or suicide by not being able to take a suitcase. Only allowed one of them multi coloured plastic boxes that go flat pack to take my clothes in. and one for my shoes. My shoes alone take 2 of them._

_If you feel for me tell me. And sorry about the lack of Girly Emmett until I update._

_Until Monday if I'm still alive and un-squished, Borndancer x_


	7. Your Taking Me To a

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I would be having frequent shopping trips with Alice

_**Recap:**_

_Alice is taking the boys and Bella shopping in Seattle_

_Everyone knows about it but Emmett, he thinks there going to play baseball_

_Alice and co have just realised that they have left Bella at home_

_Alice gets Bella back, but Bella becomes ill because of Alice's fast driving_

_Alice drives slower, to pass time Emmett plays I-Spy with Jasper and Bella._

_Alice makes Bella get nails done and wants her to have makeover_

_Everyone makes over Emmett into a girl _

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_Come on Emmett you look so... masculine"_

"_Yeah as manly as a ballerina"_

"_**SHUT IT EDWARD**"_

**APOV**

"Come on Emmett, you'll be fine"

"Bella I am not going in"

"Emmett let me rephrase my earlier statement to you, You_**are**_ going in like it or not"

"Please Alice, I look like a.. a.. a... a Barbie Doll"

"Nonsense Barbie Dolls have Long blonde hair and are plastic"

"Urghh_ Alice"_

"What? i'm trying to make you feel better"

"Urm.. Alice I think you should try to keep Emmett calm his foundation is starting to come off. At least before Jasper and Edward get back"

Tormenting Emmett was so much more fun than I planned it would be. I never thought he'd last this long. I guess I was wrong. What was taking Eddie and Jazzie so long. I asked them to take care of a simple task. Buy a semi decent video camera so we can record Emmett. Seriously how long does it take. I guess boys will be boys. Now how to entertain Emmett for another 10 minutes. Distraction?

"Come on Emmy,just think in a couple of hours all of this will be over"

"_**No it won't Alice"**_

It won't why not?

"What are you on about Emmett"

"Because you will carry this on Alice, I know what your like"

"Emmett I don't understand"

Bella walked over to me and whispered in my ear.

"_I think he means Rosalie"_

Ohhhhh, clever Bella.

"Alice we're back love"

Oooooooh Jazzie Wazzie is back with Eddie and video camera. Hopefully they will know how to work it.

"Come on Emmett, time to go"

Edwards most girlie voice sounded beside me. I hope he wasn't trying to imitate me.

"Please Edward,_**Please,**_ I've been good to you, I've always helped you out with things, stayed with Bella. Why must you do this. _**WHY?"**_

Emmett was now on the floor with his arms in the air begging to Emmett. Oh cut the dramatics please.

"Because.Its.Fun"

"Urghh"

Emmett was so funny when he was dramatic.

**BPOV**

Poor,poor Emmett I did actually feel a little sorry for him.

Edward and Jasper walked in front of me and over to Jasper. To us (Me and Alice) what they did next looked perfectly normal but to the average human civilian must have looked very strange even comical. Edward and Jasper, not the most chunkiest or strongest looking people amongst us, lifted Emmett up onto his feet and punched his arm playfully.

"Ready Emmy"

"I guess so.."

"Perfect then were ready"

Alice's face turned into a very similar one of a psychopathic serial killer.

**Sorry it's took me an extra 4 days to get this out. Don't worry I survived the camping trip. Just. I don't think I like camping much. Anyhow. Also sorry for this chapter being extremely**

**short but there is a method in my madness xD I want you to help me out with where the Cullens make Emmett go.**

**Multiple choice.**

**Would you rather see Emmett be forced to go into**

**1) A Gay bar**

**2) Speed dating place**

**3) Job centre**

**Choose your vote wisely and when picking think of the hysterical values of Emmett going into one of these with full Make-up and nails done. So think drag queen Emmy okay :)**

**The more votes I get the quicker the next chapter can be written. I would like at least 5 votes to decide. So if you don't tell me in reviews no next chapter D:**

**Also please also tell me what you think of story as well as your vote**

**TTFN**


	8. Oh Your So Tense

Are we there yet?

**Summary: **We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**A/n Gay bar won but I still like the idea of speed dating so I'm going to add that in a later chapter. :) This chapter is not intended to offend anyone and is not a mick take at people it may affect. I'm hoping I'm not going to get any flames for this chapter if I do I shall be blaming people who voted for this one xD. On a last serious note in simple terms. I am not slagging off or trying to offend Gays okay. **

**Also a big thank you to BellaCullen33, SoCalGurl101 and XTopazXEyedXVampireX for reviewing lots and lots of my chapters whenever I update. Also people who have fave'd me as an author or this story. I love you guys :) I mean it.**

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I would be being forced into frequent shopping trips with Alice

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_Perfect then were ready"_

_Alice's face turned into a very similar one of a psychopathic serial killer._

**EMPOV**

What have I ever done to any of my family to deserve this. Before I could even contemplate a way out of this mess two pairs of hands pushed me into the entrance of the building that was stood in front of us. Damn it why do I never pay attention to small things like what the building was. I stood up and was about to open the doors to the strange place when a bright pink flyer caught my eye.

Oh no. This is not happening to me. No.No.No.

_Vinnie's G.a.y Bar_

_Open 6:00 – 6:00 every day_

_Jobs Available_

_Apply within_

_**I AM NOT GAY**_

"Come on Emmett, if you want to get back to Forks by next decade"

I turned around to face stupid Edwards smirking face accompanied by Bella and a video recorder. I shuddered at the possibility's back home.

"Urghh fine"

I pushed open the double doors in front of me and walked into a darkly lit area with tables everywhere and a bar. There was music sounding from large speakers and _lots _of men everywhere.

As soon as I entered everyone in the club turned round.

_Shit_

Bella and Edward giggled behind me.

"Don't even say anything Edward, and you Bella"

So all I had to do was stay here for 30 minutes and then I could go out. I can handle this. I'm a vampire for god's sake. Cool it Emmett, cool.

**Beep**

"_Well hello gorgeous, new here?"_

Oh no.

I turned around to become face to face with a small bearded man tapping me on the shoulder. He was wearing a pink top that was obviously too tight for him and white crop trousers.

"Urm yeah"

"_Oh your so butch, and look at them muscles, they're too die for. Although I think you need to get that make-up off it doesn't suit your face shape. I'd go for more darker colours."_

"Thanks, and who are you"

"_Oh I forgot your new darling I'm Vinnie owner of this bar here"_

"Oh that's urm..interesting"

"_Oh relax darling, your so uptight and tense, come on I'll show you around and make you feel at home"_

Before I could even protest a syllable the little 'gay' man dragged me off over to a sofa in the corner of the bar. Waving and blowing kisses to the occasional man.

I feel physically sick.

I sat down on the cream leather sofa. Uncomfortably. 'Vinnie' put his hand into mine and pulled me closer to him.

"_Now darling you never told me your name"_

"Its Emmett"

"_Oh your so manly, I need a good man like you in my life"_

He started to stroke his hand against my leg.

_Ewwwww_

Do I really look gay?

"Oh ... right"

"_Oh come on relax, were all gay here there's nothing to be ashamed of"_

I didn't respond

"_Ohhh, you've never come out of yourself before have you?Don't worry we've all been there before its nothing to be embarrassed about"_

If only he knew.

It must have been 30 minutes now. I don't care I can't stand this any more.

"I'm .. urm .. going to go now"

"_Already? Come on I'll buy you a drink on the house?"_

"I'd rather not"

"_Your not trying to get rid of me are you? If you I can have you thrown out of this club in a matter of seconds you know"_

Vinnie was stood up now with his hands on his hips waiting for me to answer him. Oh how stereotypical this man was.

"_Of course I'm not ... urm I just ... need to do something"_

"_Your not gay are you?_

"What, of course I am ... _darling"_

"_Your not I can see it"_

I was going to have to go where no straight man has gone before. Touch a gay man intimately. After this charade I was gonna need a whole lot of body wash.

"Ohhh Vinnie, don't be like that"

I stroked my hand down his arm, following down his waist.

"It's just I need to buy a parking ticket for my car"

"_Oh. Well why didn't you say so in the first place. Of course your gay."_

The next move surprised me a lot. Did he actually buy that crap?

He stood up on his tiptoes and whispered in my ear

"_Don't stay away too long"_

_Now how was I going to get out of this now?_

_..._

"_**EMMETT MCCARTY CULLEN"**_

_Shit_

_--_

**My first sort of Cliffie haha xD**

**Who is the mysterious person that is calling Emmett? Can you guess??**

**I know who it is, not to brag :D Well my head does anyway**

**Anyway s as usual reviews please and I hope that this chapter hasn't offended anyone.**

**Ideas for future chapters welcome :)**

**Also**

**I am thinking of starting a new fic expect from this one would you rather me write another humour/silly one or a serious one.**


	9. Who else has visions round here?

Are we there yet

Are we there yet?

**Summary: **We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**A/n Cookies for SoCalGurl101 for well ... you'll see what I mean when you read it. :)**

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I would be still writing Midnight Sun and not putting it on hold. D:

**Are we there yet?**

"_**EMMETT MCCARTY CULLEN"**_

_Shit_

**RPOV**

"_**EMMETT MCCARTY CULLEN"**_

I stormed into the stupid little 'Gay Bar' glaring daggers at Emmett. (Knocking the occasional man over) Who does he think he is? First of all borrowing my car without even asking. Secondly looking like a prat in public and thirdly going into a Gay bar. **A Gay bar for god's sake**.

"_**WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE PLAYING AT?"**_

"Urgh hi Rose, lov-.."

"_**DONT EVEN TRY TO 'LOVE' ME EMMETT"**_

I turned around and everyone in the bar was staring at us. Oh great now all the gay men were ogling Emmett. _**My Emmett.**_

"Come on Rose, your causing a scene"

"_**DO YOU THINK I GIVE A FLYING PIG'S ARSE WHAT THESE GAYS IN HERE THINK OF ME"**_

"**Rose your asking for trouble"**

Emmett had taken to speaking too fast for the humans to hear. Through gritted teeth, may I add.

"_**Emmett, I think you have mistaken me for **__**SOMEONE WHO CARES"**_

"Excuse me_, I'd much appreciate it if you wouldn't shout so much about being gay please, some people don't like it" _

A little poncey little man dressed in bright shades of pink and white was now tapping me on the shoulder with one arm on his hip, leaning slightly to one side.

"_**I WIL SAY WHAT I BLOODY WANT TO SAY"**_

"Rose, come on, leave it"

"**GAY, GAY, GAY, GAY, GAY, GAY, GAY, GAY, GAY!!"**

"_Look lady, I'm going to have to ask you to leave or get someone to throw you out. I don't want to have to do that but I will. If Emmett wants to swing this way, leave him be honey"_

Sorry what? Did he just make out my Emmett to be gay? He's messing with the wrong woman.

"_**Did you just say Emmett was gay?"**_

"_Of course I did honey? You should have seen him before."_

Right that's it. No one calls my husband gay.

I walked over to Vinnie and pushed him (as lightly as possible for me). Unfortunately for him it wasn't light enough. Vinnie went flying over one of the tables and ended up on the floor.

"_That's it lady"_

He started to stand up dusting himself off.

"_Security"_

Two men the size of Emmett came bounding towards me. Oh great more people in my way of Mr. Gay 2008. They were about to grab my hands to take me outside. Yeah right whatever. They only got to lay a finger tip on my arm before I pushed them both into tables behind us as well. Ending up with a fate similar to Vinnie.

"_**DON'T TOUCH ME EVER AGAIN"**_

"Urgh Rose don't you think you've done enough damage for today? Why don't we just talk this over?"

"_**EMMETT WE ARE GOING ….**_

"Come on love don't be like that"

"_**NOW!!"**_

I grabbed his arm and yanked him off the sofa he was sitting on leading him towards the door. Much to the amusement of two people with a video camera.

Was that?

No it couldn't be.

It is

Great can my day get any worst?

When we got outside I was fuming. Not because Emmett has pissed me off. Not because Bella and Edward had just recorded my little scene. Not because Bella was actually in the same room as me. Oh no because Alice,Jasper,Bella and Edward had all been in on this and were shopping today. Without Me. Just because I had gone out for a couple of hours with Carlisle and Esme does not mean I did not deserve to be invited to Seattle for the day. And all of them had used _my_ car.

"Emmett.Car.Now"

Breathe Rosalie breathe. Well pretend to breathe.

"Oh hi Rose didn't know you were around town"

Alice you annoy me so much sometimes.

"Hi Alice, no I wasn't around town because _you didn't invite me"_

"Oh come off it rose, you would have said no anyway"

"And how would you know"

"Who else has visions of the future round here Rose?"

"_Urgh _I've had it with all of you. You'd rather invite some human instead of me. Well that's fine. Me and Emmett are taking the car and going home."

"Oh come on Rose don't be like that"

Do you Alice Cullen know how many times people have told me that today?

"I'm _not _being like anything. So have fun making your own way home."

I stormed off into the driver's side of the car. Not bothering to check for oncoming traffic. Starting the engine I pulled out and heading back the way I came.

Forks here we come.

**APOV**

"Ohhhhhh now I have less people to carry bags for me"

**Now Emmett is out of the Picture how are the Cullen's going to have fun and get back home?**

**Please check out my poll on my homepage and vote for if you want Emmett to stay out of this or be brought back in somehow.**

**Also keep reviews coming in please.**

**And again sorry if this chapter offended anyone. It's hard to be Rosalie and not offend someone isn't it?**


	10. Rose We Love You

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**A/n Thanks for anyone who took poll, keep voting if you wouldn't mind. :)**

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I would be playing Baseball with Edward and friends

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_Ohhhhhh now I have less people to carry bags for me"_

**JPOV**

"Rose come back, we love you"

Is there any time when Rose isn't in a mood. Poor Emmett, now he will have to feel the wrath of Rose for 3 hours on the way home to Forks. That is if he hasn't been killed by her already.

I looked over to my Alice and she was upset. Not only could I sense this but her usual happy and smiley face was hung down with a pout. Like a puppy that had just been told off.

I ran over to her and wrapped my am around her waist, rubbing her arm up and down soothingly. I know Alice doesn't like me messing with emotions but I can't stand seeing her upset. Maybe she wouldn't mind a little bit of happiness. While I was debating whether to or not, Alice's face suddenly lit up. How her emotions go from one extreme to the other amazes me.

"So everyone, I think it's time for a little bit of shopping don't you?"

Oh great, I guess I knew this would be coming sooner or later.

"Come on, it'll be fun."

"I'm hungry"

I completely forgot about Bella not having anything to eat.

"Come on Bella, we'll only be a couple of hours"

"Alice, she hasn't eaten since this morning, and it's 3:00 now"

"Fine meet us outside Tiza in about an hour. I love the dresses there, come on Jazzie dress shopping time"

What am I going to do with you Alice, love?

**BPOV**

Free, free at last. Free from Alice for an hour. Just me and Edward eating in peace and quiet. Well only me eating, but still.

"So love, where do you want to go?"

Knowing Edward, he was planning on taking me to some fancy restaurant, where all the posh people would eat, and give me funny looks.

"Nowhere near anything like what your thinking"

"Come on, love. What have you got against restaurants?"

"Just the fact that One everyone looks at me there, Two they always cost too much and Three you spend too much on me.

He just chuckled and just smiled. My favourite smile. _My_ Edwards smile.

He took my hand gently into his and laced our fingers together, rubbing the back of my hand in soothing circles, as we walked down 11th avenue.

"Come on, you can pick then, on one condition."

When your with Edward you have to learn one thing, there's always compromises.

"What's the condition?"

I smiled as he took his hand out of mine and wrapped it around my waist instead.

"You have to let me buy"

Typical, typical Edward.

"Your so predictable Edward"

He put on a shocked expression and pulled me over to the side of the pavement. He cupped my face in between his cold marble hands and leaned in to kiss me on the lips.

I was breathless when he pulled away. And that wasn't because of the lack of oxygen. Well maybe that contributed. My face began to flush and my heart began pounding uncontrollably against my chest. Edward must have heard it because he leaned his cool head against my warm one.

"Breathe,Bella,Love"

"I'm trying to, but your making it so hard"

He chuckled again.

"Silly, Bella. Come on we'd better find you something to eat before Alice eats us alive"

We walked hand in hand again down the street until we came across a familiar looking shop that I recognised. _Starbucks_

Hmm not too fancy, not too expensive. Perfect.

"Edward, can I eat here? Please"

"Are you sure you don't want to eat somewhere fancier?"

"Edward, isn't that a stupid question"

"I guess it is, I did promise you could pick, come on"

We settled ourselfs at a table away from everyone else. I hated it when people started looking at Edward and me. Not that I could blame them for looking at Edward. But me.

"So love, what would you like?"

"Just a fruit salad and a hot chocolate, please"

"Okay, I'll go order for you"

He went to leave but I grabbed his hand.

"Be quick"

He smiled and kissed my hand.

"You won't even notice I'm gone"

I admit I was gullible enough to believe that until 5 minutes had passed and I looked at the queue.

** 5 minutes later **

The queue had moved about an inch. This cannot be happening to me.

I threw my arms up in the air and laid my head on the table.

** 15 minutes later **

Come on Edward you must be bored right now. Just jump the queue god damn it. Come on your a vampire for god's sake no one would notice you were there till you were. Or I have a better idea. Kill the people in front of you. If it means getting me my hot chocolate quicker, go for it. It wouldn't hurt to kill a few people. The population in Seattle is a bit overcrowded anyway.

** 25 minutes **

"Bella, love, wake up, sleepy head"

No. I did not just fall asleep in Starbucks. Did I?

My cheeks flushed bright red and I sighed with embarrassment putting my head in my hands.

Edward just smirked.

"Come on just eat your food and drink whatever this stuff is and we can get out of here"

I sighed again.

I started to drink my hot chocolate and eat my salad as quick as humanely possible. I wanted to be out of here as soon as possible. Edward just stared at me as I ate and gave me reassuring smiles.

When I was done we walked out of Starbucks and ran as fast as I could to Tiza's.

For some strange reason Edward kept looking at me and smirking. Am I really that bad at running?

"Edward, I love you and everything but please can you tell me what's so funny?

"Nothing love"

The squeakiness of his voice and his lack of eye contact was definitely not nothing. But I didn't say anything more.

Finally we caught sight of Jasper and Alice and they were trying to contain themselves from laughing.

Oh great what fresh hell now?

When we finally got outside they couldn't hold it any longer. They just began to laugh and laugh. Alice's high pitched soprano almost musical laugh was very noticeable. I don't think I've ever heard Jasper laugh before.

Now I was angry.

"What are you all laughing at?"

"Jasper have I got a bug on my face, has my hair got dirt in it?"

"No ... Bella ... you ... hahahahahahaha"

Jasper was now on the floor laughing, if he could cry, he would be now.

"_Alice what is so funny?"_

"You... hehe ... have .. a ... hehehe you have a hot..

"_I have a hot what Alice? Spit it out"_

"You have a hot chocolate moustache"

Oh great.

"Edward.I.Hate.You"

Alice was also on the floor laughing beside Jasper now.

"Edward if you want to laugh at me on the floor, please take the time to do so now before I have to try to strangle you"

**Okay this is more of a filler chapter because A. I had writers block and B. I needed time to try to think of ways to introduce Emmett back into the story, because Emmett owns all doesn't he really. **

**Okay notice:**

**Emmett will be introduced eventually back into the story but not just yet. Because he's only been gone 1 chapter and that would be a little pointless.**

**Poll for what the Cullens and Bella do next in Seattle anyone? My homepage. Vote please.**

**Also a big, big,big massive enormous Thank you for Over 1,000 views on this story**

**:)**


	11. How it feels to be Bella

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**A/n Keep voting on poll please :) Also be happy I made my beta profile today :)**

**Okay that was pretty pointless. Because I'm happy heres an extra long chapter. 2000 word chapter **

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I _wouldn't_ be submitting documents to

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_You have a hot chocolate moustache"_

"_Edward.I.Hate.You"_

"_Edward if you want to laugh at me on the floor, please take the time to do so now before I have to try to strangle you"_

**EPOV**

"Come on, love, it was funny, you have to admit"

Bella was ignoring us all, after the little 'hot chocolate' incident. I don't think she'll last long ignoring me. I'll find a way to get her to talk.

_Please get Bella to talk I can't stand this awkward silence._

Alice and Jasper had taken to communicating to me by thinking what they want to say to me. So they don't break the silence.

_EDDDDDIEEEE, make her talk or i'm going to start thinking _very _loudly._

Oh for the love of god Alice.

"Bella, please forgive me. Please, i'm sorry"

I think i'm making progress, she isn't glaring as much now.

_Edward just kiss her already please, im bored of just walking_

Now that's not a bad way to get Bella to forgive me, I must say Alice.

I walked over to Bella and leaned down slowly to whisper in her ear.

"I'm sorry,love"

I slowly started to kiss behind her ear, trailing down to her neck. As this happened i could feel her heart begin to speed up.

She turned around to look me in the eyes and grabbed my hand in hers.

"Edward Cullen, you play dirty"

I smiled at her. Her favourite one, just to be sure she would forgive me.

She smacked me playfully on the arm.

"Stop dazzling me already, I forgive you"

I was about to lean in to kiss her again when I heard throats clearing behind me.

_Ahem_

**BPOV**

God Edward your annoying, sometimes. Well the times when I want to stay angry with you but for the live of me I can't.

I forgive them all

"So..Bella... now that you don't have a 'bag on' any more I was planning on going somewhere fun"

"Alice, I think your type of fun is much more different than my type of fun"

"Nonsense Bella, everyone loves the place where i'm taking you and the boys, I have seen it being fun."

"So its not shopping?"

"Nope"

Alice was grinning now. We really weren't going shopping? That is unusual only 1 hour of shopping for Alice.

"Well I guess it can't be that bad then."

"Follow me and Jazz then"

She pointed a petite chalky finger in front of her and turned round to smile at me and Edward as we began to start walking to Alice's 'fun' place.

**A 10 minute walk later**

My mouth fell open as I read the blue and white sign hanging on the tall building standing before me. I began to back up but came into contact with Edwards chest.

"Come on love, you know as well as me there's not escaping Alice"

He was right, I had tried (and failed let me add) to get out of Alice's trip to Seattle earlier on.

"Edward, please kill me now"

"Bella, it can't be that bad surely?"

"Edward, you aren't a klutz"

"It's not that bad though"

"But.. I can barely walk across a flat and non-slippery surface without falling let alon-...

He put his finger to my lips to stop me

"Shhh, my love. Do you really think I'd let you fall?"

I just shook my head. Incapable to do anything more such as speak. A few minutes passed and Alice was grabbing hold of my arm dragging me towards the building of Doom. Just because Alice was succeeding on pulling me into the building doesn't mean that I was going to let go of Edwards hand. We arrived in reception, with Alice pulling us into a queue with Jasper waiting for us.

"_Hello, welcome to Seattle Ice Rink, how may I help you"_

**APOV**

God this woman needed a manicure.

"Hello, I'd like 4 for the Public skate with skate hire please"

Ice skating, I haven't done this for years. We would definitely have to come Seattle more often.

"_Sure, that will be 43.66 please"_

_**43.66!! **_That's a bit much isn't it really. I just smiled sweetly at 'Claire' the woman behind the desk and handed her the money. She the gave us the skates according to our shoe sizes. I looked over to Bella. She was struggling to put them on. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Bella might kill someone here. Not any of us at least.

**BPOV**

I watched as Alice and Jasper gracefully swirled around the ice, hand in hand, with the occasional jump thrown in now and then. Poor Edward, at least he isn't breakable.

"Edward, I really can't do this"

"Come on, just grab hold of my hand and you'll be fine"

I slowly grabbed hold of his hand as Edward led me onto the ice. This is going to turn out bad I can see it now.

**5 minutes later**

"EDWARD YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T LET ME FALL"

When Edward said he wouldn't let me fall I believed him. What a lie that was. I was doing fine. Well fine in my eyes until some stupid kid charges through me and Edward, making me let go of his hand. Of course without Edward I didn't have a chance of being able to skate. I fell (in the most ungracefully way possible) flat on my behind.

Edward came _gracefully _skating towards me his lips pressed into a fine line, knowing better than to laugh at me. He'd only just got forgiven over the chocolate moustache. His arms were outstretched towards me as he kneeled down whilst skating, coming to a stop as he neared me. He grabbed both of my hands and pulled me up with him. Making sure this time he didn't let go of my hand.

"Edward, now I feel like an idiot"

"Everyone falls over once in a while at ice skating,love"

"You don't"

"Bella"

"It's true"

"Will it make you feel better if I fall over?"

I smiled inwardly to myself.

"Maybe ... but can I take care of something first then push you over"

"Okay,love. Sure you can manage on your own"

"I think so"

I tried to lean on my tiptoes to kiss him, but forgot I had my ice skates on and nearly fell flat on my face. Again. Fortunately Edward saved me.

As I watched Edward skate over to Jasper and Alice I began my search for the stupid little girl that made me look like an Idiot. I didn't really notice what she looked like when I got tripped, but what I did notice was that she was wearing one of them fancy, skate dresses in bright blue and bright white ice skates. Inconspicuous, I think not.

Now I had to find her, but first I had to get out of the middle of the ice rink. This might be a little tricky.

Come on Bella just follow what Edward told you to do.

_Right foot slide in front and out_

_Left foot slide in front and out_

I did a couple of steps and fell over.

Its alright Bella no one is looking at you.

I picked myself and tried again. 3 steps later I nearly fell again but regained my balance. Somehow.

Eventually I reached the side of the ice rink. Now all I had to do is find the little annoying girl.

It was then that I saw her. In her little dress and fancy ice skates. Not only was she showing off but she was talking to Edward. _My _Edward. And batting her eyelashes at him. Oooh this bitch will pay. It was then I had to start the long trek to the opposite side of the ice rink. This could be difficult. Fortunately for me right by where they were standing was a opening just like the one right next to me. Perfect.

I struggled over to the entrance and walked (Well hobbled would be a better word) over to the other entrance. The little cow was still trying to flirt with Edward and edging closer and closer to him. Although Edward wasn't having it, I still needed to tell this girl how things work. As I edged towards them, I saw Alice grinning at me and giving me the thumbs up. She must have seen what I was planning to do. Perfect.

I skated slowly over to Edward and_ her._

"_Oh hi Edward is this your friend?"_

Friend? Friend?

Edward was just looking at me sympathetically.

"**YOU LITTLE SLUT, TRYING TO EYE UP MY BOYFRIEND"**

"_Your boyfriend? I thought that Edward would go for the more. How would I put it? Attractive girl"_

Edward put his hand on my shoulder trying to calm me down.

"Bella, love, leave it, she's not worth it"

"**Damn right, she isn't worth it"**

With that I slapped her square on the cheek.

Score!

**APOV**

"_**Damn right, she isn't worth it"**_

_Bella skated over to the blonde haired girl and slapped her directly on her right cheek._

"_You bitch"_

_The blonde girl then went over to Bella and kicked her in the leg with her ice skate boot. The blade cutting into her leg._

"Alice,love. Vision again?"

"Yeah, I'm betting on Bella"

"What?"

"Jasper, in about 3 minutes Bella's going to go over to that girl near Edward and slap her and they're going to fight. Your going to bet on the girl to win"

"I am"

"Yep, but I disagree, I bet on Bella"

"What are we betting?"

I smiled to myself

"If I win you come shopping with me again, you win you don't?"

"Perfect"

**BPOV**

"_**Oh no you didn't"**_

"Oh yes I did"

"_Oh no you didn't"_

Our faces were slowly getting closer and closer.

"**Oh.Yes.I.Did_"_**

"_Oh. No. You. Didn't"_

Just as I was about to speak again a felt a sharp stabbing pain in my lower leg and felt myself falling. The little bitch kicked me in the leg. Before I could fall Edward caught me and was giving death glares to the blonde girl.

Oh how she was laughing. Not.

**APOV**

Stupid, stupid Alice. Not listening to her visions and thinking that Blondie would kick Bella. Before she could even move a muscle I was on her pushing to the wall of the ice rink. No one kicks my Bella in the shin. Not when I'm around. Blondie was crying and screaming. How very annoying.

"Oh shut up you cry baby"

I was about to slap her when Jasper pulling me off of her.

"Alice, calm. Calm"

I think it was a good job Jasper calmed me. For the fact that I probably would have killed her.

We were now in a line looking at the girl, Jazzie next to Eddie with Bella and then me.

Surprisingly Blondie came over to me and tried to push me over. Obviously I caught her arms before she pushed me and pushed her myself into Eddie.

Then my visions showed me what I had done.

"Nooooooo!"

As the girl fell into Edward I skated over to Edward but it was too late. Blondie knocked Edward out of balance, as he was holding Bella. Edward and Bella came crashing to the floor. As I was now standing next to Bella and Eddie. Bella instinctively grabbed onto me, pulling me down. And thus us colliding with Jasper. Creating a domino effect on the cold ice.

Everyone was just laughing as Blondie had a horrified look, as she skated off. Trying to look as dignified as possible. Yeah right.

"So now you all know how it feels to be Bella"

Only Bella could say that.

**My longest chapter so far**

**:)**

**So yes I say again Yay for being a Beta. Hint Hint. XD Na only joking**

**What did you think.**

**Myself personally, I don't think this chapter was really that good. Drabbley and not funny. In my opinion. But i'm still thinking of a funny plot to get Emmett back in.**

**Review as normal please**

**:)**


	12. I didn't know you wore

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

**A/n Okay sorry for lack of update for 3 days, I started back to school on thursday and had writers block. -sigh**

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I would have a lot of money now instead of £1 in my pocket.

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_So now you all know how it feels to be Bella"_

_Only Bella could say that._

BPOV

"No Alice, you promised me you wouldn't take us shopping any more"

After the little fiasco at the ice rink, Alice was set on doing what Alice does best. Shopping.

"No Bella, I said Emmett wouldn't have to come with me-"

She said the word Emmett as if I was a baby and couldn't speak. Pronouncing Emmett with extra syllables instead of just 2.

"- And besides a had visions of you in such a cute blue dress...-"

"Alice, there is no way in hell you are buying for me, I know what sort of shops you shop at, and I don't do dresses."

You don't do dresses yet, but there's plenty of time"

I pouted, so I had to go clothes shopping but why didn't Edward have to go.

"Why doesn't Edward have to go?"

"Because Bella, who else is going to drive the car near the shops, so me,you and Jasper can carry more bags."

I groaned in defeat. Alice noticed this and turned towards me and grinned, grabbing my hand and pulling me into the bright green Ferrari that was now parked on the roadside next to us. Getting many looks from people passing by. As I jumped into the back car I noticed Edward and Jasper in the front seats. Jasper was driving and Edward riding shotgun.

"Edward, please don't say you stole this car?"

"Do you want me to tell you what you want to hear or tell the truth"

I sighed as Edward turned around to momentarily dazzle me.

"Tell me the truth Edward"

He looked over to Jasper and then back over to me again.

"I borrowed it"

I could hear Alice giggling in the background.

"Edward, how on earth can you borrow a car?"

Alice's giggling got louder as if she knew what happened. Then it struck me. Of course she knew.

"I asked the nice young lady if I could borrow the car for the afternoon. And she said yes. What's wrong with that?"

"Did she say yes before you dazzled her, or after"

"Does it matter?"

"You know Edward, we can't all get our own way as easily as you."

I was about to give Edward an essay on how wrong it was 'borrowing' this car, but Alice interrupting me by her high pitched giggling.

"Ohhh, Bella lighten up it will be fun I swear"

"Riding a stolen car or shopping"

"Bella its not stolen,love"

"Come on Bella, shopping is real fun honestly"

"Just lets get this over and done with quick okay"

"Bella"

**Outside Victoria's Secret"**

No way. No way in hell am I going in there. This is a sexy lingerie store. I Bella Swan am in no way sexy or even close to that statement. I looked over to Alice and did my best puppy dog eyes at her.

"Bella don't even try that, besides I won't be long I know exactly what I want"

I let out a sigh of relief. Silly me, of course Alice wouldn't shop for me in a shop like this.

"That's good"

"Actually now that I think about it, we will be a little while in here"

"And why would that be Alice?"

"Because you need to try the bras on silly"

What. Oh no Alice, no.

"Bella, it's not bad besides its only you and me"

"Alice, please kill me now"

"Come on silly"

She dragged me by the sleeve of my top, through the glass double doors of the dreaded shop and around different display stands of things that would never in a million years be taken out of the pristine pink bags, that came with the bought products.

"Alice, you know, you really don't have to"

"Oh I insist Bella, Edward won't be able to resist turning you into a vampire after he sees you in these"

I just sighed and let my eyes roll, as I was dragged to a different counter of things.

"Bella what do you prefer black or pink?"

I glanced up expecting to see Alice holding up some indecent bras with floral or fancy patterns. Boy was I wrong.

"ALICE, NO, NO WAY"

"Bella I am buying these whether you like it or not, so just pick a colour or I'll pick for you"

"Alice, I can not put into words how much I hate you right now"

She just grinned at me as if I'd just given her the best compliment in the world.

"I know."

"Pink then"

She dragged me along again through the masses of people and clothes racks. The only difference was she was pulling me by my hand again. Before I could realise where we were I was pushed into the white changing room with lots of things on coat hangers all thrown into my open arms.

I groaned as I slid down the wall of the changing room, making sure the door was locked. Not that, that would stop Alice getting. I decided that I had better get the worst over first and picked up the skimpy pink thing that I had picked the colour for. As I put it on,Alice was knocking on the door demanding I come out.

"Fine Alice"

I could hear her giggling already. This is not going to go well.

As I slowly opened the door and stepped out to Alice, my face dropped.

Alice was sitting down on a leather couch with Edward sitting next to her. Not only was Edward here Jasper was blocking my only escape. The changing room door.

I blushed bright red trying to find a way into the door and covering as much of my self I could.

"Bella you look fine, don't be embarrassed"

"Alice. I. Am. Going. To. Kill. You. Right. Here. Right. Now"

"Nice choice Alice, no wonder Edwards so quiet"

"JASPERRR"

"Bella your fine don't be ashamed"

"Then why isn't Edward speaking"

"Edward speak, she s getting upset"

"I have just one thing to say to you,my love"

My head dropped in embarrassment,my cheeks still a bright shade of red.

"I never knew you wore thongs"

**So thats what Alice picked out for Bella to wear.**

**Enjoy**

**And sorry for crappyness of last chapter.**


	13. Were you just trying on?

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it I wouldn't have to be put through the tortures of school at this present moment in time.

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_I have just one thing to say to you,my love"_

"_I never knew you wore thongs"_

**BPOV**

I blushed an even deeper shade of red, if that was even possible and hid my face in my hands. I opened my fingers a fraction to glance over to Edward he was just smiling at me. All my thoughts of being angry vanished. Looking down over my body I realised I still only had the Victoria's Secret lingerie on.

"Urm Jasper can I get into the changing room now? Please"

"Oh sorry Bella"

He stepped out of the way in an instance and was over by Alice, holding her hand.

I just simply smiled and stepped back into the changing room, where Alice couldn't make me try clothes any more. Yet. Maybe if I take a while I'll escape a bit of shopping. Now that is what I call a plan, Bella"

**JPOV**

I watched as Bella dissapeared behind the pristine white door, as the lock clicked.

"So Eddie, Jazzie time to be official Alice clothes holders.

Oh no. As much as I love my Alice to bits, I do have to admit I _hate _her shopping compulsion. Is it possible for someone to shop do much. Rosalie never has shopping on her mind 24/7 does she?

Alice ushered me and Edward back out into the store of Victoria's Secret, throwing us the occasional item of clothing every now and then. Eventually Bella came out and we checked out everything, much to Bella's dismay.

The rest of the afternoon went by in a blur as we were rushed through shop to shop curtsey of Alice. Whenever I asked her why we were still shopping she blamed it on Bella, saying that she had no 'decent' clothes.

Eventually we came to another shop. The outside was grungy and tiles were falling off the roof.

Alice shopping in here? No it can't be. Alice would never lower herself to this degree to shop in somewhere like this.

"Alice? Are you sure this shop, love?"

"Jazzie!"

"Yeah but Alice, do you really want to lower yourself to one of these shops and another lingerie one, we have just been to Victoria's Secret"

"Edward, trust me, there is something good in this shop, you don't want to miss it"

"Fine"

We all replied in unison, even Bella, as we trudged along after Alice. As we followed her, it seemed as if she knew exactly what she was looking for and where it was. Suddenly we all looked at each other, Alice at the front grinning widely.

"Oh my god"

"Please don't be"

"This isn't for my eyes"

"Surely it isn't that bad"

Trust Alice to try to lighten a situation like this.

In front of all of our, very confused and mortified eyes was a large, bulky man with brown curly hair, with a very close resemblance to our Emmett. The disturbing part wasn't that Emmett was clad in foundation, lipstick and painted nails, not that he was in a female lingerie shop without a women accompanying him, oh no. The disturbing part was that Emmett, our Emmett, straight and not in the slightest way transsexual Emmett was holding up a women's white lace bra, up to his chest and holding it to himself in places no man should know.

"_**Emmett"**_

Emmett glanced over to us with a very amusing expression. His mouth was wide open and his eyes wide as saucers, as he dropped the bra to the floor.

"Emmett were you just trying on a bra?"

...

...

...

...

"no"

**Sorry but I haven't been updating everyday, like I did a couple of weeks ago but due to school and coursework and general rubbish. I can only update like every 3-4 days. **

**Sorry for shortness as well.**

**Just thought I'd mention the highlight of my week, its funny and true honestly :D**

**My latin shoes I use to dance in (High heel shoes with grip for those who don't speak dance.) got killed on Monday night. D:**

**As I went out to the car to go to dance classes I put them on top of the car because it was locked. Then I got in the car without my shoes. You can see where this is going XD**

**Basically I was on my way home and I saw one of my shoes in the bus stop. **

**So ... MY LATIN SHOES GOT RUN OVER BY A BUS.**

**XD**

**The moral to this fanfiction, don't leave shoes ontop of cars, it costs you lots of spendaroonies to buy new ones. And you are also taken the Michael out of by friends and dance teachers.**


	14. Those Good, Old, Bad, Old Days

Are we there yet?

**Summary: ** We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it the beginning and middle of New Moon would never have happened.

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

"_Emmett were you just trying on a bra?"_

_..._

_..._

_..._

_..._

"_no"_

**EMPOV**

It was 10 minutes after the scene where I saw the rest of my family in the bra shop, since Rosalie dragged me off earlier. And of course they were still laughing and cracking jokes. I don't see what the problem with a very masculine man seeing what a bra would look like on him, for laughs only of course. Only Edward and co had to pick the wrong moment to find me, Alice's doing I suspect.

"Edward If you don't shut up I will kill Bella"

We all glanced over to Bella as we heard her heart speed up slightly in nervousness.

"_Emmett _do not get Bella involved in this"

"Well stop laughing"

"But it's oh so funny"

I looked seriously into the eyes of my ever so annoying brother as he tried to keep a straight face.

"Edward I _will_ kill Bella. _And _in front of you"

"Emmett you are acting very childish now"

Before I could even come up with a remark Alice stormed over to us with a displeased look on her face.

_Edward we're stuffed_

Edward glanced over to me, his lips twitching up into a slight smile.

"EMMETT deal with it this was funny, get over it, and don't threaten Bella again or I will tell Rose that you've turned bisexual"

"Fine"

I was just about to turn to walk over to Jasper and Bella when everyone turned to look at me, including Bella.

"Wait a second Emmett"

"How the hell are you here?"

**EPOV**

_Emmett's Flashback_

_Rosalie dragged Emmett by the collar of his shirt into the jeep. _

"_Rose Lo..."_

"_Don't say a fucking word"_

_Emmett reached over to Rosalie, who was now driving, to hold her hand but she just slapped it away. _

"_Rose it was a joke"_

"_I DON'T CARE IF IT WAS A JOKE OR NOT YOU DON'T EMBARRESS ME IN PUBLIC OR GET OFF WITH DISGUSTING GAY HUMAN MEN!"_

_Emmett reached over again to grab her hand but this time she pushed his body away, resulting his body flying out of the car with the door still grasped firmly in his hand._

"_Shit"_

_End Flashback_

I began smiling widely as Emmett replayed what happened between him and his wife in his head. It was quite amusing really.

"_Eddie!!!! _You know you love me"

"Only if we don't do any more shopping Alice"

"_Hmph_"

**So so so so ... very sorry about lack of update for like ages.. I had major studying to do. On the plus side I should have more time now and not as much writers block. YAY ........ On the down side, silly England have to wait an extra month while you Americans get Twilight on friday. -cry ...... ah well**


	15. Two Could Be As Bad As One

**Are we there yet?**

**Summary: **We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullens ways of driving fast . So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself,Emmett,Jasper and Edward. Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullens to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it, Jasper would have a bigger character :D

* * *

**Are we there yet?**

**JPOV**

This was getting beyond a joke now. We were still shopping in Seattle, 25 Million hours later from when we arrived. Someone had to do something. But would anyone risk it and stand up to my Alice and tell her to stop shopping?

"Alice, sweetheart. Do you not think it's time to go home now, love?"

I waited for her to erupt into bell like laughter. But it never came.

"Of course Jazzie. Bella will start getting hungry in 2 hours and 3 minutes anyway"

I just blinked and nodded, as my wife grabbed hold of my hand and pulled me to where the rest of the group were standing, as Alice announced to everyone that we were heading home.

"I know, everyone is having an amazing time here, but its getting late we need to go home now"

I watched as Bella and Edward turned towards me and smiled gratefully. And Emmett .... Emmett was still sitting up a tree. Still trying to catch a bird. Why oh why are you such an idiot Emmett. I really for the life of me can not understand what goes on inside your head. Edward can and i don't think he wants to.

**APOV**

"Come on everyone, lets go to the car"

I followed Alice as she lead us over to a smallish car park, quite close by to the shops. Where she had parked the car earlier. I was just getting ready to go towards where she had parked when i noticed Alice's face suddenly changed dramatically.

"Alice, love what's wrong?"

Aww Alice and Jasper are so sweet. Stop it Emmett concentrate .

"Urm ... guys i think we have forgotten something ... again"

"Alice this is not the time to go shopping for more stuff"

"I'm not Emmett"

"Don't even start that, you made me stop hunting a lickle pretty tweety bird which i most obviously could have caught .."

"Emmett this is important"

"NO.. Don't cut me off Alice, you think you own this shopping trip just becau-.."

"EMMETT WE HAVE NO WAY OF GETTING HOME, ROSE TOOK THE CAR"

Oh shit, she did.

I ran over to Alice at just passable human speed and jumped into her arms. My arms clinging round her neck.

"ALICE!!! WHAT ARE WE 'GONNA DO WE'RE DOOMED. DOOMED I SAY DOOMED"

"Emmett calm down, and get off me. We're just in Seattle without a car"

"BUT WE HAVE NO SOURCE OF FOOD OR ANYTHING"

"Emmett we are in Seattle. There is such thing as a county park. And it's not as if we're in the middle of no where. Besides if push came to shove for food, there's a big population here"

"How dare you even bring people into this conversation, Alice."

"Well your the one who brought food up"

I was about to continue with my argument with the rights and wrongs of eating people when i realised something very important.

"Urm Alice, i have something really important to tell you"

"If its about the bird that you couldn't catch, don't waste your breath"

She answered mindlessly, gazing into the air. Trying to come up with a solution to out little car problem.

"ALICE. THEY'VE FUCKING LEFT US"

"Wha.."

She turned around quickly, her mouth open and eyes wide as saucers.

"They've seriously left me stuck with you, while they catch a taxi home, they are so dead"

"Look at it on the plus side, we can play I-spy together since you never played earlier"

"URGHH ... I HATE YOU EMMETT AND I HATE YOU EDWARD CULLEN FOR SUGGESTING TO EVERYONE TO LEAVE ME WITH FRICKING BIRD CATCHER"

"So who starts in I-spy?"

"Urghhh"

**Most likely not my best but**

**oh my effing gawd i actually updated are we there yet**

**Am i have delusion is this fanfic actually updating**

**I thinks my eyes are decieving me xD**

**This fanfic will stay updated from now on  
**

**also**

**SORRY IF I CAN'T UPDATE THIS OR ANY OTHERS MUCH UNTILL THE 2ND WEEK IN APRIL**

**I'VE ATTATCHED A AUTHORS NOTE TO THIS FANFIC TO EXPLAIN**

**:)**


	16. AN Explanation

Sorry, if I got your hopes up for a new chapter but this is a very vital and important author's note to this story and all my other twilight one. E.g. are we there yet and a peaceful night at the Cullen's.

I will not be able to update any of my fan fictions for 40 days. Unless I have time on a Sunday which is unlikely.

The reason.

For lent my friends said to me.

"_I bet you can't give talking about twilight and anything related to twilight up for Lent"_

"_**oh my gods I so totally can"**_

"_Okay, give twilight up for Lent. Which is 40 days by the way"_

"_**Ahh shit"**_

"_We will buy you a Edward cullen cut out or a trophy if you do"_

"_**Will it be a life size version of Edward??"**_

"_Urm … yeah sure .._

"_**OKAYYYYY **__****__**"**_

So Basically I can't live, and breathe twilight for 40 days …. Which sucks because I can't count down to the film release AND can only read fanfiction on a Sunday

-cry

The good news I get my own Edward cullen to glomp

:D

Okay

Peace out

X


	17. Bite me

**Are we there yet?**

**Summary: **We all know that Bella hates shopping and the Cullen's ways of driving fast. So what happens when Alice makes Bella go shopping with herself, Emmett, Jasper and Edward? Will she get out of it? Or will she finally get the Cullen's to drive at a Bella pace.

Disclaimer silly business now:

Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and any characters from it

If I did own it, Midnight sun would be published right now DX

**Are we there yet?**

**EMPOV**

"Oh Alice, what are we going to do"

"Emmett stop being melodramatic, I'll just call Edward and he'll get us back or whatever"

"But... but what if we never see Forks again?"

"Emmett we are a couple of cities away from Forks, get a hold of yourself"

"But..."

"EMMETT WE ARE FRICKING VAMPIRES, WE COULD RUN HOME IN A HOUR OR TWO"

Okay so maybe I was being a little overdramatic but still

...

I suddenly turned my head towards a couple of people who had gathered after hearing me and Alice shouting.

"_Shit, Alice what are we going to do?"_

I whispered in low tones, too quiet and fast for the humans to hear.

"_I don't know just don't say anything idiotic"_

"Okay but should we tell them we are vampires?"

The crowd of people suddenly gasped, serious expressions crossing their faces.

Okay my bad, maybe I forgot to talk fast that time.

"_YOU IDIOT"_

She slowly pushed past me at human speed, heading towards the humans. Most likely to give them an explanation for my little outburst.

**APOV**

"I'm sorry about him, he goes a little crazy sometimes, seems to have a vivid imagination doesn't he ha ha"

I put on the fakest laugh I could manage. Let's just hope to God these humans believe me. Then grinning to myself as the drabble of strangers began to walk away. Until one was left. She was of medium height, with long black hair flowing down her head, her lips and nose pierced with a ring.

There's always one. One nosy human who's curiosity got the better of them. I don't think the message 'curiosity killed the cat' is thought of as highly these days. Maybe it should be.

"Excuse me but if I heard correctly _you _labelled yourself as that word as well"

"I'm sorry I don't know what you're talking about"

"You know the creature of the night you called yourself. A vampire."

"I'm sorry I think you're mistaken, that was my brother, see"

"No it was you, but don't worry I won't tell anyone about what you said"

"Really I think you were hearing things"

"I wasn't I heard you loud and clear. You're a vampire. How does that work?"

I looked over the strange human's shoulder at Emmett trying to signal for him to come over here and to walk away.

"It doesn't work, I'm not a vampire and neither is my brother. Emmett come on we're going now"

"Wait don't go, I have things to ask. What do you eat? How do you eat? How are you in daylight now shouldn't you be in ashes?"

"Emmett let's go"

Emmett ran over and gave me a questioning look. I simply shrugged my shoulders, as we began to make our way out of the car park we were still standing in.

"WAIT ... Bite me"

The girl suddenly ran over to Emmett, tilting her head to the side, exposing her neck to him.

Are humans really that suicidal these days?

That's when I noticed the glint in Emmett's eyes"

"_Emmett, don't. It's not worth it"_

I whispered quickly

He didn't move.

"_What would Rose say?"_

He dropped his head in defeat and pushed the crazy girl away.

"Lets go Alice, somewhere where crazy delusional people don't hang around"

...

...

...

***A couple of minutes later, out of the car park ***

**EMPOV**

"Well Alice i think that was pretty well played by me. Don't you think?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well you did a pretty good job back there, but we all know who got us out of this mess don't we?"

"Yeah, and we both know who got us both into it too"

Damn

**A/n Lent has finished: D Aha updates are back for good **

**I didn't break my lent once, and did my friend get me the life sized Edward Cullen cut-out she promised?**

**Did she hell**

**The only reason i did Lent was for that.**

**I get a fricking book instead**

**Feel free to send messages to my friend **Natalie-Jayne-Cullen ( on )

**Such as**

"**Please send Borndancer her Edward cutout "**

**Or**

"**Borndancer is awesome and you should keep to your promise"**

**Haha**

**I'm being serious free glomps to anyone that does and ... i will include you or your OC in next chapter =] It would make me update quicker too aha ... PM me if you do please :)**

**:]**

**Peace out now**

**From a person who managed to go 40 days without Twilight**


	18. Final Authors Note

**A Final Authors Note**

Firstly i would like to say a great big thankyou to all the readers of this Fanfiction. For all the positive feedback i have received on it. I decided that the last chapter will be the final chapter in it.

But ... thinking of writing a sequel or another similar story to this :D

If you would like me to write a sequel, just message me or tell me in reviews

Also

In the last chapter i asked you to PM my friend 'natalie-jayne-cullen' about why she never bought me my end of lent present

She told me in school about a weird PM she received off a member of Fanfiction.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE, tell me if it was you that PMed my friend

As promised you can have your input in the sequel to this story



Much love

X

Borndancer


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